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What Kind of Doctor Do You Want for the Apocalypse?

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What Kind of Doctor Do You Want for the Apocalypse?

Oct 24, 2016

The end of civilization as we know it has finally come. Whether it be by robots, zombies, aliens or some other unimaginable event. In your gang of survivors, which medical specialist would be best for your survival? Emergency room physician Dr. Troy Madsen gives his picks for the type of doctor most likely to keep you alive after society collapses.

Episode Transcript

Interviewer: It's an end-of-the-world scenario. What medical professional would you want on your team? We'll examine that next on The Scope.

Announcer: This is "From the Frontlines," with emergency room physician, Doctor Troy Madsen, on The Scope.

Interviewer: All right. I'm going be the first to admit that this episode probably doesn't necessarily have any useful health advice in it, but it's more of a fun podcast to do since Halloween is coming up. And I was wondering in the event of an apocalyptic situation, whether it's zombies, robots, or aliens, if we found ourselves in an end-of-the-world sort of scenario, what kind of medical professional would you really want to have on your team? And I would think that perhaps an emergency room physician might be a good one to have.

We're with Dr. Troy Madsen, who happens to be an emergency room physician at University of Utah Health Care. So who should I have? I mean, I've heard some different kind of arguments. One person said an OB/Gyn because they have the basic medical experience and also can deliver babies. I've heard EMTs because they have that kind of in-the-crisis, sort of being able to stop the bleeding sort of a situation. Or an emergency room doctor. What do you think?

Dr. Madsen: Well, here, I've got to be careful because I'm clearly biased. I mean, there's no question about it. And I know you know what you think I'm going to say and I'm not going to going it. I'm not going to say, "ER doctor." Although I think an ER doctor would be great in that scenario because we are trained in all different fields. I'm going to say a family practitioner because they can deal with the emergencies. They've had some training during their residency in dealing with emergencies. And I'm not only going to say a family practitioner. I'm going to say a rural family practitioner.

Interviewer: Get very specific here.

Dr. Madsen: Someone who works in a rural area who does minor surgeries, who does OB, they deliver babies, they do that sort of care, they deal with emergencies, they take emergency call, they do pediatrics. Because sometimes in family practice, people may become more specialized to where they're just doing clinic stuff but this is the one I want. I want a rural family practitioner in that scenario not only because of their training but because they're experienced to handle all these sorts of different things. I think they'd be a great person to have in a zombie apocalypse to take care of whatever ails you.

Interviewer: I guess I didn't consider that because we worked at a large academic medical center where, like you said, people really do specialize.

Dr. Madsen: We do.

Interviewer: And they still have to go to medical school, but they've spent the last 20 years of their life dealing with one very specific thing and probably could get the job done. But a rural practitioner, they don't have backup.

Dr. Madsen: They don't.

Interviewer: They don't have a specialist.

Dr. Madsen: They don't. If they have to get backup, they have to send them on a flight for two or three hours or they have to get them in an ambulance. So they know how to deal with this stuff. And I'm a little biased because I grew up in a small town of fewer than 10,000 people and I heard the stories there from some of these old coal camp doctors in the coal mining towns. And these guys were basically the kind of guy you'd want in the zombie apocalypse.

They would tell stories about miners coming in after head injuries and pieces of their brain sticking out. They couldn't transport these guys. They would just cut off part of their brain and stick the skull back on. And the guys were okay. They survived. They would deliver babies on people's living room tables. So these kinds of old school cowboy types, family practice types in rural areas that we certainly still have out there in a lot of these very rural communities, that's what I want in a zombie apocalypse. They . . .

Interviewer: That's who you want on your team.

Dr. Madsen: That's what I want on my team.

Interviewer: What about a vet, a veterinarian? There are sometimes these shows that have these scenarios where like, "I'm a vet." But they manage to get the job done.

Dr. Madsen: Yeah, I guess if you want to be euthanized or get immunized, you could get a vet. I'm just kidding. No. I think . . . yeah, I mean, it's funny because I once knew a vet, a woman who was in vet school and she said that . . . she made the argument that vets should be able to also care for humans because they care for all other species. Maybe there's some truth to that. I don't know. I mean, they do have a very wide skill set. Quite honestly, vet school is harder to get into than medical school. These are very sharp people.

Interviewer: And the basics are the basics, right? If something is bleeding, you stop the bleeding the same way, right?

Dr. Madsen: Yeah.

Interviewer: If something is giving birth, that kind of all gives birth in the same way, right?

Dr. Madsen: Exactly. I mean, I'm not going to go on record to say I necessarily want a vet over a family practitioner in a zombie apocalypse, but there's something to be said for . . . they have a very wide skill set, they may deal with all kinds of species.

Interviewer: All right. Let's hope that this scenario never comes true.

Dr. Madsen: Let's hope not.

Interviewer: No robots rising.

Dr. Madsen: Yeah, exactly.

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